Texas is an obsession. Jennifer Yane. The festival includes live performances from Texas artists like Aaron Watson, the Josh Abbott Band, Kyle Park and more. They hung the wrong horse thief. -John Steinbeck, Dont mess with Texas. Texas is Texas. "Pleas'd to look forward, pleas'd to look behind, and count each birthday with a grateful mind." - Alexander Pope. I love you so much, honey. -Philip Sheridan, If a mans from Texas, hell tell you. Kelly Clarkson 0 Copy They took a great failure and turned it into a tourist destination that makes them millions. Happy birthday to a person who is smart, good looking, and funny and reminds me a lot of myself. You don't know the Lone Star State until you've experienced Gruene Hall. He could talk the legs off a chair. birthday drawing files drawing. -Carl Sandburg, Texas is like a beckoning star to American settlers. And we Texans know how to take it all in stride! Here's to another year of pretending we have our lives together. Texas literally has a pledge they say every morning. In the name of the constitution of Texas, which has been trampled upon, I refuse to take this oath. -Robert Kiyosaki, I was always proud of being from Texas and, you know, maybe that was part of fearlessness. Beyonce's tracks like 'Baby Boy' and 'Crazy in Love' secured top positions in the 'Billboard Top 100' countdown charts. hes cheap. 7. This ain't my first rodeo. I feel lower than a gopher hole.I feel so low I couldnt jump off a dime.She eats sorrow by the spoonful.You look like you were sent for and couldnt go.Sad enough to bring a tear to a glass eye.He looks like the cheese fell off his cracker. 7. Happy 70th birthday! I will pray that you receive more than you have hoped for this birthday. I like the image Texas brings to mind-that of bigness, of strength, of goodness. Wish you a memorable day and an adventurous year, Happy birthday. -Sam Houston, Thats the thing about East Texas. -Molly Ivins, The Texan turned out to be good-natured, generous and likable. Hey, we're thrilled that you're here! Texans represent many things to the uninitiated: We are bigger than life in our boots and Stetsons, rugged individualists whose two-steppin has achieved worldwide acclaim, and we were the first to define hospitality. Ann Richards, One day, it just dawned on me that Im from Texas, and thats what I am. Sissy Spacek, People from all over the United States can pick Texas out on the map. This digitized version has since been updated to remove offensive lines. Ive traveled all over the world, but I dont think there is any place better than Texas. Red Adair, No place like Texas would I ever roam. -Kelly Clarkson, Sectional football games have the glory and the despair of war, and when a Texas team takes the field against a foreign state, it is an army with banners. I feel sorry for you. If that aint a fact, Gods a possum. )Why shear a pig?Dont snap my garters.A guilty fox hunts his own hole.Quit hollering down the rain.Dont rile the wagon master.Better to keep your mouth shut and seem a fool than to open it and remove all doubt.The barn doors open and the mules trying to run. Otherwise, I wish you a very happy day, darling. Jos R. Ralat is Texas Monthlys taco editor, writing about tacos and Mexican food. May your birthday be as beautiful as your soul is lovely. He could draw a pat hand from a stacked deck.He always draws the best bull.Hes riding a gravy train with biscuit wheels.He could sit on the fence and the birds would feed him. Hes been saucered and blowed.He sure cleaned your plow. If you get sick, injured, or have your stuff stolen, youll be happy to have the ability to pay for your medical bills or replace whats stolen or broken. Happy Birthday. It's your birthday! May god pour all his love and warmth on you. You were too hard to raise to take chances.Dont dig up more snakes than you can kill.Whistle before you walk into a strangers camp.Dont plow too close to the cotton.A dead snake can still bite.A dead bee can still sting.Dont tip over the outhouse. 2. "Texas is the finest portion of the globe that has blessed my vision.". Getty A police officer walks outside of the closed Alamo on April 1, 2020 in downtown San Antonio, Texas, during a stay at home order amid the novel coronavirus outbreak. Texans are obviously proud of their state, and these Texas quotes show exactly that feeling. The Texanist: Contemplating the Texas Exit. He blames everything on the weather or his raising.He got caught in his own loop.He came close to the dollar knife. Every year on your bday, you get a chance to start new. It moves into you. Manny Fernandez, As a Texan and a country music fan, I didnt learn George Strait songs; I knew them the same way I know English. Jack Ingram, Texas has yet to learn submission to any oppression, come from what source it may. Sam Houston, Id heard about Texas football and how much of a religion it is, but to go to Odessa and experience it first-hand is something different than just hearing about it. Jay Hernandez. I was going to get you a present, but I figured my presence was enough of a gift. Dream to touch the skies. Nows Your Chance. -Senator William Blakley, Ill be somewhere down in Texas if youre lookin for me. Texas is a cult. A toast to you, birthday girl! On the final day of the '86 show, the State Fair of Texas celebrated its 100th birthday (f.y.i. Got a big hole in the fence.I got my ox in a ditch.He loaded the wrong wagon.They hung the wrong horse thief.He ripped his britches.Theres a yellowjacket in the outhouse. People from all over the United States can pick Texas out on the map. There's more to come, be prepared and keep thinking big even as you grow older. ), I have a good friend whos a Texas girl. Got any more Texas sayings, quotes, expressions, or slogans you like? As welcome as an egg-sucking dog.As welcome as an outhouse breeze.As welcome as screwworm.As welcome as a porcupine at a nudist colony.As welcome as a skunk at a lawn party.As welcome as a wet shoe.As welcome as a tornado on a trail drive. It was the home of Tejano patriot Jose Antonio Navarro, who was influential in the fight for Texas' independence. May you have a delicious and partylicious birthday! Y'all. Funny Quotes on Birthday. It ought to do so, for no country upon the globe can compare with it in natural advantages. And funny birthday saying about age that shed a positive light on getting older. Dumb as a box of rocks. Happy birthday, best friend. I thought it was a joke. He could fall up a tree.Couldnt ride a nightmare without falling out of bed.He couldnt knock a hole in the wind with a sackful of hammers.So bad at farming he couldnt raise Cain.He couldnt hit the floor if he fell out of bed.Handy as hip pockets on a hog.Worthless as teats on a bull.Worthless as a sidesaddle on a sow.Not worth spit.He couldnt organize a pissing contest in a brewery.Useless as two buggies in a one-horse town.He could screw up a two-car funeral.Tie a quarter to it and throw it away, and you can say you lost something.Hes got no more chance than a June bug in the chicken coop.Hes a day late and a dollar short.He cant win for losing.Hes sucking hind teat.I need that like a tomcat needs a trousseau.Shes itching for something she wont scratch for.Why close the barn door after the horses are out?No more good than an eyeless needle.Like warming up leftover snow.Like pushing a wheelbarrow with rope handles.Like sweet-talking the water out of the well. Lets shoot out the lights.Well paint the town and the front porch.Lets hallelujah the county.Put the little pot in the big pot.Throw your hat over the windmill.Ill be there with bells on.Ill wear my Sunday-go-to-meeting clothes.Hes all gussied up. for that talkative friend. His breaths so strong you could hang out the washing on it.That coffees so strong itll put hair on your chest.Coffee so strong itll walk into your cup.Coffee so strong itll raise a blood blister on a boot.Hes so strong he makes Samson look sensitive. If your favorite 60-year-old has a good sense of humor, teasing them a little (in good fun) is okay. May your birthday be as sweet as you are. That Texas pride really shines through in these quotes. Just popped in to make sure that you have a blast on your birthday. Rich, poor, Panhandle, Gulf, city, country, Texas is the obsession, the proper study, and the passionate possession of all Texans. John Steinbeck, Half of San Antonios population is of Mexican descent; the other half just eats that way. Mike Greenberg, If you really want to learn the attitude of how to handle risk, losing, and failure, go to San Antonio and visit the Alamo. Cute and Quirky 60th Birthday Sayings. Anything that large and inspiring is bound to have a few haters, right? Above all, Texas is a nation in every sense of the word. John Steinbeck, If a mans from Texas, hell tell you. Ron Brackin, I didnt drive eleven hours across the state of Texas to watch my cholesterol. Many Baby Boomers acknowledge their 50 th . Hell squeeze a nickel till the buffalo screams. On your Birthday, my dear sister, I wish I can go back in time and slap myself every time I hurt you. Hope your birthday cake is as sweet as you! Join us on this incredible adventure! Looking for famous Texas quotes, Texas sayings, and Texas one liners? He was wrong about horses, for most horses are considered to be valuable, and are treated very well. Inspirational Birthday Quotes There are two great days in a person's life - the day we are born and the day we discover why. Next 1 - 75 of 18,884 images . "Moscow mules and sweet tea.". It was like Austin, Texas. Craig Ferguson, Texas is neither southern nor western. Shes got a bun in the oven.Shes sitting on the nest.Shes got one in the chute.Shes been storked. Don't die a copy." John Mason Quotes to Live By If hes not, why embarrass him by asking? John Gunther, Texas has yet to learn submission to any oppression, come from what source it may. ~Sam Houston, Some folks look at me and see a certain swagger, which in Texas is called walking. George W. Bush, Texas is neither southern nor western. 10. Hes overdrawn at the memory bank. Editors note: This article was first published in print in 1994. She is a strong Vanguard worth E2ing eventually for the gameplay gains as well. So I got a cake." - Mitch Hedberg, comedian Lets not preach to the choir. Did you hear me? As exciting as waiting for paint to dry.As exciting as a mashed-potato sandwich.As much fun as chopping wood.Dull as Henrys bone. Happy birthday to my favorite person who's still younger than me! The How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days star, 53, and . Texas history for $200, Alex. hes crazy. All joyous things and more. No hill for a stepper.Slick as a whistle.Easy as pie. A 106-year-old cowboy in Texas recently passed away. Hot as Hades.Hot as the hinges (or hubs) of hell.Hot as a depot stove.Hot as a two-dollar pistol.Hot as a billy goat in a pepper patch.Hot as a summer revival.Hot as a pot of neck bones.Hot as a stolen tamale.Hot enough to fry eggs on the sidewalk.Hotter than whoopee in woolens.Hotter than a honeymoon hotel.Hotter than a burning stump.Hotter than blue blazes.Hotter than a fur coat in Marfa.So hot the hens are laying hard-boiled eggs. Bless your heart. She could start a fight in an empty house.Hed argue with a wooden Indian.She raised hell and stuck a chunk under it.Hes the only hell his mama ever raised.Hes got his tail up.Shes in a horn-tossing mood.Shes so contrary she floats up-stream.Shes dancing in the hog trough.Hell tell you how the cow ate the cabbage. "Don't just count your years, make your years count.". Its especially important to get travel insurance if youll be hanging out in cities like Dallas or San Antonio where tourists can easily become the targets of pickpockets. -Travels with Charley, If I owned Texas and Hell, I would rent out Texas and live in Hell. Im a little obsessed with travel quotes. Don't die a copy." John Mason "You are. -Sissy Spacek, In Texas, we practically come out of the womb in jeans. Looking for Best Road Trip Ideas in Texas. Port Arthur people thought I was a beatnik, though they'd never seen one and neither had I. I'm from Texas originally, and I've always wanted to be in a horror movie, so I've gotten both of my wishes with this project. She is part of the Holy Trinity of Trading Post Maximization: Exusiai, Texas, and Lappland. Todays Texas is exhilarating, exasperating, violent, charming, horrible, delightful, alive. Edna Ferber, author, For all its enormous range of space, climate, and physical appearance, and for all the internal squabbles, contentions, and strivings, Texas has a tight cohesiveness perhaps stronger than any other section of America. What to make of a state that is so focused on itself? 1. -James Michener. Celebrate one more turn around the sun with the collection of quotes about birthdays below. The Alamo is a great story of brave people who chose to fight, knowing there was no hope of success against overwhelming odds. Robert Kiyosaki, What you northerners never appreciate is that Texas is so big that you can live your life within its limits and never give a damn about what anyone in Boston or San Francisco thinks. James Michener, There is a growing feeling that perhaps Texas is really another country, a place where the skies, the disasters, the diamonds, the politicians, the women, the fortunes, the football players, and the murders are all bigger than anywhere else. Pete Hamill, In the covered wagon days, if a baby was born in Texarkana while the family was crossing into the Lone Star State, by the time they reached El Paso, the baby would be in the third grade. Wallace O. Chariton, Theres a vastness here and I believe that the people who are born here breathe that vastness into their soul. 70 sounds old, but when I look at you, I still see a lot of youth in you. An 18th birthday is exciting but your 21st birthday will be even better. I can't believe it's already been a year since the last time I didn't buy you anything for your birthday. Shes frying size.Hes knee-high to a grasshopper.Hed have to stand up to look a rattler in the eye.About as big as the little end of nothing.Half as big as a minute.No bigger than moles on a chigger.Scrawny as Ace Reid cattle.Nothing between the horns and hooves but hide.Thin as a bars ear.Thin as a gnats whisker.Thin as store-bought thread.Thin as Depression soup.Thin as a fiddle string.Thin as a rake and twice as sexy.Flat as a fritter.Scarce-hipped.So skinny she has to stand twice to make a shadow.So skinny you could give her a Big Red and use her as a thermometer.So skinny she shades herself under the clothesline. So crooked that if he swallowed a nail, hed spit up a corkscrew. In three days, no one could stand him. Joseph Heller, I felt a little guilty about jangling the poor buggers brains with that evil fantasy. I'm so glad you never act your agelet's have some fun tonight! Let us know below. 12 Must-Stay Cabins in Texas for your next trip, 18 Amazing Day Trips from Amarillo, Texas. Happy Birthday For Him Wishing you a Texas sized birthday! Count your life by smiles, not tears. Read our. How much we love you so. Here you go! - Funny Birthday wishes. Big Tex welcomed 3,959,058 visitors to Fair Park during the exposition, the largest attendance ever for an American state fair and the longest fair in American history. Texas is Texas. William Blakely, People dont live in Austin to work. Illustration by Gary Locke Dry So dry the birds are. So whether youre looking for travel inspiration or Texas Instagram captions or Facebook statuses, here are my favorite Texas quotes! -Rache Caine, No matter where you go in East Texas, Deep East Texas is always about twenty miles further in than wherever you are. You mean the world to me, on your birthday and every day. Base Skill Analysis. Texas is a blend of valor and swagger ~Carl Sandburg, There wouldnt be no Alamo, No Cowboys in the Superbowl No Lonesome Dove, no Yellow Rose, If it wasnt for Texas. George Strait, Im so shook. Birthday Quotes Comedians Alan Gastelum "Put candles in a cake, it's a birthday cake. I wrestle with these questions all the time. Even if theyre not American, people know about Texas. Count not the years, but the life you live. 3. Happy birthday." "Count not the candlessee the lights they give. It's your 60th birthday! Wishing you a lot of surprises and happiness on your 65th Birthday. It proclaims them. When: March 4-5. He broke his arm patting himself on the back.He thinks the sun comes up just to hear him crow.Id like to buy him for what hes worth and sell him for what he thinks hell bring.Shes so spoiled salt couldnt save her.Shes so spoiled she expects spoon-feeding. (Say what? Did we forget any popular Texas idioms and sayings? -Davy Crockett, Thats why I like Texans so much. Happy birthday, friend! 10. -Pat Green, You dont just move to Texas. There is a world of country to settle. (Throwing up. - The US death toll from . Want to Buy a West Texas Ghost Town? Feel free to use this post to find beautiful quotes about Texas for your photo captions, Texas Instagram captions, Texas Whatsapp status, Viber status, Texas Facebook status, or however you want! -John Gunther, Im so shook. Look what the cat dragged in.Companys coming; add a cup of water to the soup.Weve howdied but we havent shook.Put on your sitting britches.Lets chaw the rag. Birthdays are a time to celebrate, reflect on the year, and make future wishes for the year to come. My current favorite is thePacsafe Citysafe, which is especially great for Texas because it has many anti-theft features designed to deter pickpockets in Texas cities. Discover and share Texas Birthday Quotes. Happy Birthday To Me Quotes. Funny 60th Birthday Quotes. I'm so thankful you're in my life, and I hope you have a very special birthday! After you're done reading them, vote for the ones that you've enjoyed the most and share this article with anyone stuck writing a birthday note! Here's hoping you hear your husband say, "I have a present for youand it's jewelry!" I'm thinking of you today. He told them that for the past 50 years he had sprinkled a little gunpowder on his cereal each morning. What to make of a state that is so focused on itself? 5. If a trip around the world cost a dollar, I couldnt get to the Oklahoma line.Hes so broke hes busted all Ten Commandments.Poor as a lizard-eating cat.Hasnt got a pot to pee in or a window to throw it out of.So poor I had a tumbleweed as a pet.I ate so many armadillos when I was young, I still roll up into a ball when Ihear a dog bark.So poor we had to fertilize the sills before we could raise the windows.Poor as sawmill rats.Hes broke as a stick horse.Hes too poor to pay attention.So poor the wolf wont even stop at their door.So poor their Sunday supper is fried water.Too poor to paint, too proud to whitewash. (Your flys down. Most Texans know about the references to the Lone Star State size in Texas quotes and sayings. I have been a paying customer ofWorld Nomadsfor travel insurance for three years, and I happily recommend them. Hes got a hitch in his gitalong.Sick as a dog passing peach pits.All stove up.Im so sick Id have to get better to die.Sore as a boil.Her hoppers busted.As full of pains as an old window.Ive got the green apple nasties.He looks like death warmed over.So sick he needs two beds.Pitiful as a three-legged dog. -Ann Richards, Havin fun while freedom fightin must be one of those lunatic Texas traits we get from the water which is known to have lithium in it because it goes all the way back to Sam Houston, surely the most lovable, the most human, and the funniest of all the great men this country has ever produced. 65th Birthday Birthday Wishes Birthday Friends Husband Birthday Birthday Wishes Happy Birthday Sister Funny 60th Birthday 50th Birthday 50 Year Old Birthday Love Belated Birthday Thank You But what the hell? I pay forWorld Nomads,and I happily recommend them. Singers Jessica Simpson, Beyonce, Hillary Duff, Kelly Clarkson and Demi Lovato are a few famous faces who hail from Texas. Looks like hell with everyone out to lunch.Out where the buses dont run. Enjoy the trip. Whether quotes about its wide, starry skies or sayings about its rough way of life, Texas has a way of staying on your mind. Texas girlsare tough as nails and you'd be hard pressed to ever shake them with adversity. Only Texas could turn defeat into a legendand a song, and a tourist attraction, and a major motion picture. ~Rosemary Kent, speaking of the Alamo. Collections. 0 ; Copy When compared with all the other happy birthday quotes, this one is especially unique. It means you're no fool. -Cherie Priest, Texans aint Texans if they arent willing to boast about the state they call home. They hung the wrong horse thief. for when something goes wrong. There is no one alive who is 'you-er' than you! Let us know the happiness time brings, not count the years. I'm so grateful I get to celebrate your special day with you. If hes not, why embarrass him by asking? John Gunther. Want to plan your Texas road trip in a few easy steps? Subscription: Inactive; Credits: 0; View Cart; Help; 900+ Texas Clip Art | Royalty Free. "When I was young, the Dead Sea was still alive.". Happy Birthday to you! Even if theyre not American, people know about Texas. "Her favorite dress is her favorite blue jeans.". Dont mess with Texas. Texas Department of Transportation slogan for a campaign to reduce littering on Texas roadways. Here are 10 Texas Slang Words To Sound Like A Local. Herere the best Texas sayings, quotes, and expressions. March 2, 2011. Texas Birthday Quotes & Sayings . They call her radio station because anyone can pick her up, especially at night.Hes wilder than a peach orchard boar.Loose as ashes in the wind.Loose as a bucket of soot.Wilder than an acre of snakes.She uses her sheet for a tablecloth.He was born on the wrong side of the blanket.Shes found a new dasher for her churn.They ate supper before they said grace.They planted their crop before they built their fence.Theyre hitched but not churched.Theyve got a cotton-patch license. Home Texas 71 Best Texas Sayings and Quotes for Proud Texans. Custom and user added quotes with pictures. At Texas Swingers Clubs, the Lifestyle Is Booming, My Brothers Ashes, the Bayou, and an Enigmatic Life, What Is Left to Say About Waco? This aint my first rodeo. On your birthday, I promise to keep all your secrets, to flood you with gifts and never to miss a chance to make you smile. Someone doesn't merely dieshe opens herself up a worm farm. It may be your birthday, but you are a gift to me. (A hangover. Here are some fun quotes about Texas, yall! Independent as a hog on ice.I dont know you from Adams off ox.Thick as the dew on Dixie.Thick as fleas on a farm dog.Thats two different buckets of possums.Things are going to hell in a handbasket.Come hell or high water.Lord willing and the creek dont rise.I dont care if it harelips the governor.Serious as the business end of a .45.Baptists and Johnson grass are taking over.Hes so slow he could gain weight walking.Out like Lotties eye. Here is your ultimate guide to best quotes about Texas Sip on some sweet tea or have a plate of pecan pie handy as you scroll through! -Jensen Ackles, Texas is like Australia with the handbrake off. Still, we put together a good number of phrases and quotes about Texas for yall. Dream big and make them true, so that one-day people get inspired by your sheer guts. Looking for beautiful quotes about Texas? Never ask a barber if he thinks you need a haircut. Texas is a state of mind. I love Texas too well to bring civil strife and bloodshed upon her. If youre headed to Texas, check out my guide to visiting the San Antonio Missions,the Houston Space Center, and Mustang Island. She occasionally writes about travel, too. -James Michener, I like the image Texas brings to mindthat of bigness, of strength, of goodness. Sam Houston. 2. I wish everyone the world over had the dominating spirit that motivates Texans. Billy Clayton. Texans dont bury their failures. Waco: American Apocalypse Doesnt Even Try. On your birthday, I just want to remind you that you are the best person I have ever met in my whole life. A birthday is just the first day of another 365-day journey around the sun. So dry the birds are building their nests out of barbed wire.So dry the catfish are carrying canteens.So dry the trees are bribing the dogs.So dry my duck dont know how to swim.Its been dry so long, we only got a quarter-inch of rain during Noahs Flood.So dry Im spitting cotton.Dry as a powder house.Dry as the heart of a haystack.Drier than a popcorn fart. Many people rush from one birthday to another without actually enjoying the journey. If that aint a fact, Gods a possum.You can take that to the bank.You can hang your hat on it.You can bet the farm on it.Hes so honest you could shoot craps with him over the phone.If I say a hen dips snuff, you can look under her wing for the can. I always like to pick mine up ahead of time. Hot will cool if greedy will let it.Take a tater and wait.Dont get your panties in a wad.Wash off your war paint. You are such a sweetheart babe! Confused as a goat on AstroTurf.My tongue got caught in my eyeteeth and I couldnt see what I was saying.I can explain it to you, but I cant understand it for you.He ran em around the barn.Cattywampus to Miss Joness. Above all, Texasis a nation in every sense of the word. Here are some of the uniquely Texan sayings not for the faint at heart! "You Can Imagine Me as a Kid Growing up in Redneck Texas with Ballet Shoes, Tucking the Violin under My Arm. Booth Tarkington The more you praise and celebrate your life, the more there is in life to celebrate. Texas girls are a whole different breed. John Cusack, What you northerners never appreciate is that Texas is so big that you can live your life within its limits and never give a damn about what anyone in Boston or San Francisco thinks. James Michener, I like it here in Austin. Need Texas sayings about girls from Texas? Back then the Panhandle had a panhandle. "Never forget, son, when you represent Texas, always go first class."- James Michener "A born Texan has instilled in his system a mindset of no retreat and no surrender. I'd be part of Texas folklore. We also want to be the first people to greet you a Happy Birthday! Rich, poor, Panhandle, Gulf, city, country, Texas is the obsession, the proper study, and the passionate possession of all Texans. John Steinbeck, Theres a freedom you begin to feel the closer you get to Austin, Texas. Willie Nelson, During the cold war, West Berlin was an exclave a tiny outpost of liberalism surrounded by people who wanted to crush it.
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